# bye bye social life :)



## nutmeg07 (Sep 14, 2013)

My 8-month-old female V and I have some time management issues. She comes with me to work daily (I work with horses), so she gets a lot of time outside running in open spaces, with other dogs and with me. We leave home at about 7.30 in the morning and return home anywhere from 5 to 8pm. Evenings at home she spends either sleeping or chewing a bone, and the nights she spends in her crate. Its been a long road to this point, but now our days are very pleasant and she has become a very lovely dog to be with. She gets a lot of exercise and therefore "a tired vizsla is a good vizsla" point made! On the weekends we do other stuff, go for walks, do city stuff, visit friends etc. She gets put in her crate for about two hours on both weekend days, and has been fine with this. 
When I first got her, she was incredibly easy to toilet train, and has never soiled her crate. Except once about a month ago, and now yesterday evening. Both situations were similar, I had left her in the crate in the evening from about 6-9.30pm, which is the longest time she has spent in the crate (excluding night time), and she was barking when I got back and had peed in her crate. I had gone out to have dinner with friends. My social life has totally disappeared since getting the puppy when she was 9 weeks old, and although I don't really mind as I love my dog and prefer her company over others, these two attempts were just to try and catch up with my friends for longer than just a quick coffee or quick drink for an hour or so before I have to go and rescue the dog from the crate (my friends have started to think I'm slightly mad, or I must be hiding a baby at home...). Shouldn't she be able to hold it in for a bit longer than that at that age, she's 8 months? I can't remember having this sort of problem with my previous dog, she was quite happily left roaming the home for 6-7 hours during the day and was fine (although I can't remember the puppy times that accurately...). I'm not intending to do leave her for that long, but would be nice to go out SOMETIMES... I haven't been too fussed about it, but I thought 8-month-old could handle it occasionally... Maybe I was wrong, I felt terribly guilty when I found her distressed in the crate...


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## MCD (May 4, 2013)

Our girl is just 1 now. She was suffering terrible crate and separation anxiety. We just bought a smaller crate and do occasionally have to leave her for a day in it. She is a lot better with the 4 inch difference. Instead iof coming home and it always being soiled it is rarely soiled. Some dogs just take longer to master this and mature more slowly I guess. But when we do go out it is like we do need to get home to '"rescue Dharma from her crate". We have become a lot more sensitive to the time we spend away from home.


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## texasred (Jan 29, 2012)

I would try slow and steady to see if she comes around . 
Just gradually increase the time she's in the crate.
She gets plenty of exercise during the week, so I would crate her and go do a errand every other evening for a hour. On a weekend try 2 1/2 hours and slowly build on the time, but make sure she is tired before you leave her.
Dogs can hold their bladders a lot longer when they are calm, but when they are upset the time is shortened.
DAP has a spray that helps some dogs. You might give it a try while trying to overcome this problem.


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## R E McCraith (Nov 24, 2011)

I go with anxiety - Tex gave some great advice ! now for the new V owner - some rules to increase your social life
1 invite your friends over as much as possible so they can grow up with the pup
2 never take the pup to visit unless invited to & then bring a crate
3 you will make some great new friends in the field
4 on the weekends invite your friends over for a off lead hike and dinner
5 the more time your friends have with the pup - the less crazy you look
6 do it right and your V extends your social life - some times in a new direction - THAT is a GOOD THING!!!!!!!!


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## hcrowder (Dec 26, 2013)

My V is 6 months and we have very little social life. We moved to the UK from NYC all of 5 months before we got her so we didn't have a ton of friends here that knew us before we got her. In the first couple months we never went out. I was tied to the house and we only went out on weekends if we could take her with us. We are lucky in that most of London is very dog friendly. 

We have a great dog walker that boards her when we are away. There are times we ask him to keep her later in the evening so we can grab a drink or have a social life. Is it possible for you to find someone to look after her while you go out? Our walker is really reasonably priced and has a couple dogs of his own so when he takes her to his house she has a blast running and playing. Knowing that she is having fun makes it a lot easier to leave. For 20 pounds our walker will pick her up in the morning and return her around 9pm if we are staying out late after work. 

I second making the crate really small and slowly building up the time she is left in the crate. I also think it might be good for her to spend a little less time with you. Can you send her to doggy daycare once a week? If the time spent away is really fun it might lessen the anxiety and you can slowly build up the time when you are away and she is in her crate.


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## jld640 (Sep 29, 2010)

I may be off-base on this one, but I bet your leaving routine was different. 

Going out socially for me means trying on two or three different things, putting on evening makeup, and doing up my hair. Inevitably, I'm rushed so the energy is different. It's a far cry from shoving feet in shoes, grabbing keys and heading to the grocery store.

Think back and see if your routine or energy was different enough to stress her. If so, you may have to 'practice' getting ready to go out so she knows the signals and that it isn't the end of the world.


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## MCD (May 4, 2013)

Yes now that you mention it- our girl picks up on a different vibe when I leave for work vs other times. She figures it out when I grab treats and toys and when I have my work uniform on. She usually has to go out before I leave just to make sure she doesn't have to go either. We also try to keep feeding and water consistent within the schedules.


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## nutmeg07 (Sep 14, 2013)

Come to think of it now, yes those times were a bit different, and the days in general were a little out of ordinary. I know she's very sensitive to my moods, so maybe thats part of it. I find the whole thing a bit distressing, as she's fine with the crate at night time, sleeps in it the whole night, and has now for months, and she has been left in it for shorter periods, 1-2 hours, fairly regularly. Thanks so much for the advice though everyone, and one thing I really must take on board is that I have to leave her alone more often, as she's with me so much on a regular basis. She absolutely loves chewing bones and playing with her toys and having treats and kongs etc, but if I put them in the crate with her, she won't touch any of them. I can't get her to entertain herself in there, she would just sleep, and if she doesn't feel sleepy, then thats it, she's just probably just worrying about getting out. I only put her in the crate when she's tired, but still :


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## number10 (Jun 2, 2014)

I wonder if she needs to get used to being on her own more. Hard to do if you are lucky enough to be able to take your dog with you during the day, and that is what she is now used to. 

Might be famous last words in my case, but I have been popping in and out and putting puppy in the crate for an hour or two during the day a few times a week because I have to: to go to the shops, or to go to the gym or to visit a friend. Even to take the cat to the vet ha ha. It was the vet who told me I should make little trips out regularly and often and leave her in the crate to get her used to it, from the beginning. Other members seem to be giving good advice to help manage the separation anxiety now it seems to have surfaced. Poor wee doggy. I'm sure you can work through it. You could always seek the advice of an animal behaviouralist if you were really concerned to nip it in the bud. Whatever you do, don't let yourself be isolated - everyone needs a social life.


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## jld640 (Sep 29, 2010)

Just to echo your sentiment with one that I have posted before. Being alone is a skill for these dogs. 

Savannah comes to work with me, too. We practice alone time. Every. Single. Day. She will be four this summer. I can still tell the next day when I have missed giving her some alone time the day before.


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