# Big Changes... Tanner and I need some help



## tanners_mama (Sep 22, 2011)

Okay so this is going to be a little in-depth but will help to understand the whole situation Tanner and I are going through right now.

A couple of weeks ago my boyfriend, who I was living with, and I broke up. His 3 year old great dane has been Tanner's best friend since the day I brought him home at 10 weeks. Now at 15 months it's all he's known. They spent hour of every day together. We all know dogs are creatures of habit, and he hasn't had to deal with any big changes... until now :-\

I moved into my mom's place last week until I get into my own place November 1st. I work during the day however I take Tanner to doggie daycare 2x/week. The days he has not gone to daycare, my mom has gotten calls from her apartment office saying that Tanner barks/cries from the time I leave until the time I get home :'( He's obviously going through a huge change, and being without the Great Dane I'm sure is very hard on him. I've been having lots of play dates with my friend's dogs, and taking him on lots of walks, etc. He just seems like a different dog now. I'm most concerned with the barking during the day. I'm very worried that this will continue into my new place, in which I have to be careful to not get kicked out. It's an apartment of a house, but has a great 1 acre fenced in backyard. I picked this place specifically for Tanner and what would be an easy transition for him. 

I need help/suggestions. He's going through a lot right now. So am I, obviously. I want to make this as easy as possible but the barking/crying during the day will not be OK. What should/shouldn't I be doing at this time? I have 2 more weeks with my mom until we move. If I could afford to take him to daycare 5x a week I would... but it's not possible. 3x a week is a possibility, I'll obviously do anything I can to help him through this. But I'm sure there might be things I can do to help fix this now. Has anyone else experienced this before? I'm open for anything.... thank you all.


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## CrazyCash (Jul 12, 2012)

That's a tough situation - sorry for all the changes!

My guy Cash recently went through a similar situation - he's a year old and both of my other dogs have passed away in the last 6 weeks. Cash was with them all day every day and when he suddenly found himself alone he was very sad and lonely. He too started barking and howling during the day when I was at work. He also started barking at any sound he heard at night, I think he was scared because he didn't have his brothers to protect him. 

This last week I got rescue puppy and Cash is a happy dog again! The crying during the day has stopped and he sleeps soundly through the night again. I don't know if getting another dog is an option for you, but if it is I would highly recommend it. If your dog is anything like mine, they are extremely social and being alone is so sad for them. 

I don't know if that helps, but I hope you find a solution soon!


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## harrigab (Aug 21, 2011)

this is a toughie tm, but here's a suggestion, just not sure if it'll be practical but here goes...if you and b/f are still on speaking and amicable terms would it be possible to take Tanner over maybe twice a week and then gradually reduce the visits?


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## jld640 (Sep 29, 2010)

Difficult for everyone -especially for you!

I think I would start as if he were a puppy again. Make sure you exercise/ play with him before you leave for work, leave a radio playing softly in the background, and put something that smells like the two of you in his crate with him. Whatever toys worked to keep him occupied as a puppy might be a good addition. We didn't use frozen kongs or antlers, but if you did, the familiarity might be nice. Come home for lunch. Be mindful that greetings after work should be calm. If your situation allows it, you might consider going around to the neighbors, explain the situation, and apologize for the noise. Tell them what you are doing to help Tanner with the transition and that you would appreciate their feedback about how much Tanner continues to cry.

You might also get your Mom involved in developing new routines. If he is just ‘out-of-his-element’ then once he establishes new routines with new friends he should settle down.

Good luck!


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## tanners_mama (Sep 22, 2011)

Thanks for all of your suggestions so far 

CrazyCash - It is not possible for me to get another furry friend right now. If I could, I totally would! Maybe one day when I have a big enough place on my own. For now it'll be just Tanner and I.

harrigab - I have thought about seeing whether or not Tanner could stay with Jane a couple of days a week... however I'm nervous the longer he's with her during the day, the longer it will be until he gets used to being on his own. I may ask my ex if that's something he would consider 1 or 2 days a week...

jld640 - thanks for the good ideas. I've been trying to keep everything as similar as possible. He still gets his frozen pb kong every morning, feeding is the same, dog park/long walks at night, daycare during the week a couple days, etc. I've also been making sure to make time to come home at lunch to help too. I will try the radio/tv as well as something that smells like me. I remember I used to do that when he was a puppy, maybe it will work now


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## adrino (Mar 31, 2012)

Sorry to hear about your stressful time, its tough. 

All I could suggest is to try the Adaptil Dap Diffuser. It's specially recommended for times like that.

Hope he settles down eventually and your next place will suit you all more. Keep us updated.


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## tanners_mama (Sep 22, 2011)

adrino said:


> Sorry to hear about your stressful time, its tough.
> 
> All I could suggest is to try the Adaptil Dap Diffuser. It's specially recommended for times like that.
> 
> Hope he settles down eventually and your next place will suit you all more. Keep us updated.


Thank you for this... I have never seen/heard of anything like this before. I'm willing to try ANYTHING to make this easier on him. Have you ever used one before? Is there a weening off period at all? I'm going to google it tonight and hopefully be able to easily buy one online.

It is definitely tough. I called the office who phoned the woman who lives below my mom to ask how the barking/crying was today. She said that it wasn't constant, however off and on and it sounds like hes continually banging his crate (trying to get out?). Poor guy. Daycare tomorrow - thank god :/


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## adrino (Mar 31, 2012)

I used the Adaptil Dap Spray with great success in the car. Elza used to be sick and would poopoo in the car from stress. When we started to use the spray it was like a miracle! She loves the car now and we don't have to use the spray for a long time. Still have half a bottle left. 
I bought it on eBay because at the Vet it was very expensive. You've got to search around to find a good price since it's not cheap but I believe it would help in your situation. My breeder actually suggested it for me when we brought Elza home but unfortunately I didn't listen to her... Until later when I asked her about the car and she suggested it again. Best £17 I've spent on her.

Hope you're both coping and healing together!


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## tanners_mama (Sep 22, 2011)

I definitely still need to look into getting the DAP diffuser/spray online. I was also at a local pet expo over the weekend and got the chance to speak with a pet behavioral specialist. She mentioned something called a "thunder shirt" apparently they are pretty common and aid in relaxing an anxious or bervos dog. Has anyone had any luck with this product?


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